Handle, who has been on a comment roll in recent weeks, wrote
it’s easy for kids to make and keep close – sometimes lifelong – friends when they see the same other kids at school, church, sports, and around the neighborhood for palling around. . .
. . .even while one thinks one is suffocating from claustrophobia and lack of privacy and just wants to bail out to the other, atomized anonymity side where the grass is greener, when people actually leave, they discover pretty quickly they feel terrible, isolated, lonely, uprooted, and aimless, and it can take a long time to adjust, and some never quite recover. Prison and the military are two good examples of that, but start-up culture seems to be similar in some respects.
The comment refers to Sebastian Junger’s claim that people derive satisfaction and meaning out of being associated with small groups under hardship. Imagine a stereotypical start-up, in which a handful of people work very long hours in an environment that is challenging, uncertain, and ambiguous.
When I started a business, I repeatedly watched The Compleat Beatles, a documentary about the iconic band. I picked up on a couple of points.
1. Because the narrator said that they were lucky to meet the right people at the right time, I made an effort to meet a lot of people (something I have not done before or since).
2. The film describes the hardship that the Beatles endured in Hamburg, where they lived in slum conditions and played exhausting marathon sets. A fellow musician said that with the long sets and tough audiences, “Either you got good or you gave up.” Taking that to heart, I often worked late into the night, even though the traffic to my site was on the order of 100 visitors a week when I got started.